Miss Lily Regrets...

The cats have grown comfortable in their substitute slave's presence. Too comfortable. Their resolve to remain aloof at all times is a distant memory. First, BJ leaps into the pantry and rearranges its contents. Soon after, Lily shows off her acrobatic skill by rearing onto her hind legs while singing for her supper. Then the ultimate betrayal of the cats' cool exteriors comes when Lily's favourite toy rolls onto the scene...

LILY: Ah, Monsieur Ping-Pong, how nice of you to visit. I see your sojourn beneath the sofa has done wonders for your complexion.

BJ: Careful, Lily. V is lurking about with her not-so-discreet camera phone. You don't want to do anything silly, now. Consider the effect Mr. Ping-Pong's charms have on you. All he has to do is look into your eyes and--

LILY: It's too late! He's pulling me into his gravitational field. Nothing can tear us apart. I...must...have...him!



BJ: Meanwhile, as this catastrophic event is occurring, you still find a nanosecond in which to apply Revlon Red to your lips. Golly, and you say I have no self-control. You've brought shame upon both of us. Ooh, I can't look!


LILY: Mon dieu! You're right. Oh, BJ, what have I done? I've demeaned myself in front of the substitute slave. Word of this will spread, I'm sure of it. Ohhhhh!


BJ: Snap out of it, Lily. There's only one thing you can do--pretend nothing happened, OK? Just look wide-eyed, sweet and innocent. And don't you dare give that Mr. Ping-Pong another glance.



LILY: Mr. Who?